. In GUCCIDERE
In recent years fashion brands have all collectively decided to see who can make the ugliest clothes.
Nobody remembers exactly why this happened in the first place–was it a freak reaction to the Strokes breaking up? To Alexa Chung starting her own denim line? To the fact that random shitheads on the internet became more “influential” than actual fashion designers who very much deserve the titles they sucked dick for??!!!
The reason behind the Fugly Fashion Fenomenon remains a mystery but the results are quite apparent.
And the competition is steep!
Between VFILES, Opening Ceremony, Vaquera, Eckhaus Latta and YEEZY, an un-educated person might think that NYFW does fugly fashion best! Sure, these brands make me vom in my mouth, but do they matter?
Sorry, hun. No.
Fuglyness is only relevant when an internationally-renowned (aka European) brand does it. Who does it best??? It’s pretty hard to keep up with the fugliest brand in the world. Previous brands holding the title of “World’s Fugliest” have been Margiela, Prada, Gucci and obviously VETEMENTS (I’d mention Céline but honestly, who cares about her?).
Today, I think we have a new winner: BALENCIAGA!!!
Congratulations, BALENCIAGARBAGE 🙂 Lets see what you’ve got for us.
Aged punk rocker + sex-deprived librarian + sunset enthusiast = walking yeast infection.
Ok these shoes: I get it, they look amazing on Instagram. Bloody ankles in a hospital bed will also look great on Instagram! But imagine all the Wolford stockings you’ll have to throw away? Those are like 30 bucks a pop-not worth it! If you want something biting at your ankles all day just rescue an abused puppy.
The look in her eyes says: “I was dead for a day but I used my own body bag and *Tyra Banks Voice* made it fashion”!
This poor model was so ashamed of the #look Lotta threw on her, she did whatever she could to hide her identity from the fashion photographers so this gig doesn’t ruin her chances of landing more prestigious jobs (for Victoria’s Secret). I can just feel the acne forming under those bangs!!! Loves it!!!
Hoping the latest headlines about Donald Trump will distract people from the REAL trouble in this world: flannel.
My least favorite things on Instagram used to be 1) people having more fun than me 2) people invited to parties I’m not invited to and 3) b-rate memes. Now all 3 of those are replaced with these platform crocs. I’m blocking anyone who posts them from now on !!! Including my own mother !!! (JK she already blocked me)
There you have it, the evil stylist behind it all. Why you play us like this Lotta? Do you have something against me personally? I know I have something against you personally, since after I played you in Kooking With Keta you immediately dyed your hair blonde so that nobody would recognize my role of a lifetime! You’re not hurting me anymore, Lotta, you’re only hurting yourself.